First of all, a BIG THANK YOU to all my friends and acquaintances who acknowledged the day of my birth and dropped me a line on my blog, texted me, or even called *sob sob*; the love was much and very appreciated!! *blows kisses*
To get to today’s post: Over the past few mins, hours, days- actually, to be completely honest, this topic has been on my mind for many years- I have been thinking on “Friendships and Acquaintances”. Whoever knows me (well) knows of my need for clear definitions, as it is crucial for two individuals engaged in a communication- of whatever kind- to be in the know and on the same page on matters of the heart and co. There is nothing- at least in my opinion– as sad as two people discussing two completely different issues. Communication –stone me– must make sense; no ifs no buts. While many communication/relationship experts blame the falling out of couples on a lack of communication, I dare say, it is not so much the lack of communication, as it is miscommunication! So what is right and what is wrong communication? Read some books! This is not topic of today’s post.. it is “Friendship and Acquaintances”.
(See how annoying this was? Me getting you all into the right and wrong of communication, just to let you know we are talking about something else? *vomit*)
Anyway, so today, I want to discuss Friendships and Acquaintances. Actually, I do not so much want to discuss them, as I want to share my view-point on these. I might have one, I might have none at all; but I’ll give you some insight into how I feel about these. I guess we all- to a varying degree- have experienced human relationships on both personal and objective levels- yes, believe it or not, relationships can be experienced objectively- and consequently have a thing or two to say about them.
I am not attempting to define “friends” and “acquaintances” here (we’ve all done that or seen people do that), neither am I drawing a line between the two (as I believe such lines to be blurry and almost always completely unnecessary). I am not throwing the following statements at you in the hopes of shaping you, making you a better person, helping you separate the goats from the sheep, or even improving your friendship skills. No, I am merely sharing statements/feelings/opinions common to man. Do with them what you may, but at the very least: please do something! If it is think, think well. If it is change, change completely. If it is improve, do so with commitment to perfection. Yes, I believe perfection (in many aspects) to be attainable; but let “perfection” be defined! As you do so, remember to reflect His light.
I have a friend who loves me. He loves me so much, he makes sacrifices for me. Sacrifices so big, he often ends up hurt. Sometimes so badly, his life is in danger. I am not sure I want to be his friend, I am not sure I can. I am not sure I should. ~A
I have a friend. Actually, I have many. They make me laugh, they laugh at me. They make me cry, they cry with me. With them I feel secure. With them I feel Me. ~B
I don’t talk much, but when I need someone to talk to, I know where to go. I am surrounded by people of wisdom. People whose words I respect and heed. I might not have a lot, but I sure have goodly counsel. ~C
Of course I trust her; she’s my best friend. There are just certain things I would never tell her. You know, when you know someone really well, you know you cannot entrust them with certain secrets. At least not, if you want to make sure they remain as such. ~ D
I know a girl. She is my friend although she makes me sick. She makes me cringe. She makes me weep. But she loves me and I love her. I don’t know why. When I spend time with her, I wish I could just get away; but when I do, I long for her. I know it’s weird, but I wouldn’t want it any other way. ~E
There is a friendship I wish I could end. I would have ended it long time ago- but we have been friends for too ng. Whenever I think of ending it, I think of all we’ve been through, and it becomes difficult. He’s been there for me so many times, it wouldn’t be fair pulling out now. ~ F
I have a friend; I like her. I like her but I’d never travel with her. At least not again. She is too demanding. She needs too much attention. It is too much work. She’s alright in small doses; in larger ones she’s toxic. ~ G
Note how they are all “friends“? In one way or the other we’ve all been and had these people: I myself have at earlier times treated some friends as acquaintances, and some acquaintances as friends (by my own definitions, assuming these exists). I have trusted those who have not earned my trust- those of whom I never asked it, or of whom it was never required- denied it those who have proven trustworthy with certain and untrustworthy with other things, or even broken that entrusted to me.
What I have however not done, was play judge or play God. I have allowed him in, and her play. Him do this, and her do that. I have played the role of a friend and confidant, the role of a sister and mentor; sometimes even that of an ingrate and abuser, misuser and maltreater, but one role I’ve always failed to play was that of a “selector“.
I have failed to choose my friends and/or acquaintances wisely, to allow and disallow some people access to me. I have failed to draw clear lines, say “thus far and no further”, and stick to those lines. Today, my dear friends and acquaintances, I publicly draw this line and invite you to stick to them. Yet, even if you choose not to, I will!
For today I have chosen to be a friend to myself!