Call it balance.
Sometimes unexplainable things happen. I say unexplainable because- although you try to explain what’s going on to people- you know that no one really gets it, no one really fully understands. But that’s okay.
I just feel like being real and honest, transparent, readable, naked tonight..
Tonight I want to share some naked thoughts.
Call it therapy.
But even more than that, I want to share some truths.
Call that ministry.
Things change. If there is one thing that is certain in life, it really is that things must change.
Even more than times and season, there are changes that must happen in relationships and their dynamics.
Sometimes, when things happen secretly and change suddenly, it hurts.
It hurts because there is no communication, no clarification, no discussion, no justification.
All there is are plenty of tears.
Tears, a silent cry… a silent whisper.. the hope of eventual clarity.
What I’ve once again been reminded of is that in the midst of it all, especially in moments of confusion and ambiguity, the Lord wants you to step out of self and see through His eyes. And so He whispers..
Often these words are sweet, encouraging. They inspire you to achieving more.
At other times, however, these words are simply instructions. Do (not do) this. Full stop.
Whatever it be, you kind of know you are really best of holding on. To trust Him and obey; believing He knows best.
Sometimes you want to step in, change His mind. Convince Him. You really want to help Him help someone.
Not out of fear but out of love. You want to shield from potential pain, protect from hurt, do something.
You really do not want the other to learn, hurt; experience change because you know just how much the stretching can pain.
You stilt development. Out of love, you want to ensure they remain under a constant umbrella of safety and warmth, naivety.
And so you decide to once again make a move, act although you have been told not to, speak although you’ve been told to keep quiet.
Being silent is not as easy as it seems.
Often it hurts badly. It hurts to see that no one sees what you see, knows what you know,
Some might even want you to humble yourself and act contrary to what you know He has told you (not) to do.
Sometimes really, you must stand alone.
Watch the other laugh and joke and gist, and remain.. well, alone.
What I was reminded of- once again- was that He works in mysterious ways.
Where one sees and feels abandonment, the other sees room for growth and development.
An opportunity to hear without intrusion, instruction, someone else’s opinion.
Sometimes giving room hurts. Sometimes it feels empty, strange, unfamiliar.. unfair.
But even in the midst of all that pain, He gives you peace.
And even though that peace comes at a price, He makes the pain bearable.
He brings in others.
Others to be comforted by, to get to know, to love.
At the end of the day.. He works in His own way.
He teaches lessons no man could ever teach.
Causes you to walk on paths yet untouched by man or nature.
Sometimes you really do not know what to make of His ways.
Whether to continue or just give up; remain steadfast or just throw in the towel.
Sometimes, just sometimes – no, most times- it really doesn’t matter.
What matters is that you choose to trust and obey.
Trust that He’s got everyone’s best interest at heart, and that He knows how best to bring His purposes and plans to pass.
He needs no help, no help being God.
He just needs you to trust and obey, and step away.
And sometimes stepping out really just means literally that: getting out of the way.
Until the other sees and understands.. and returns, understanding..